I am scared and terrified for my 11 year old niece. Her father is a shallow, hypocritical entitled middle class helicopter parent, and her mother, my sister, is a sweet, diplomatic, obliging, loving, well rounded mother. I see both of them in the girl, and I am worried that the entitled little madam will win out over the sweet little girl.
I want to grab her and hold her to me and teach her all the good and nice things about this world. Teach her about substance above form, altruism above wealth, empathy above self-centredness, content above aesthetics. I want to teach her about listening to her own heart above the pull of social pressure. I want to point out all the things in her mindset which are introjects from her father’s view of the world, and how it can be different. I want to love her and care for her and cherish her the way I would, and her mother would, our own child. To show her a better way to be an adult than the example her father is setting.
I want to keep her here in London, with me, away from her jerk of a father.
But it isn’t my place.
It isn’t my place.
My place in who’s world?
Whose rules are these?
Have I ever been one to follow rules I don’t like?
I am her aunt.
I can be her example in the world, can I not?
It will be hard, and I won’t even know where to start, long distance. I can do it when we are in the same physical space… this IS my flat after all and they are in MY space… but… once they go back to their home… how do I do this?